pottstonya (pottstonya) wrote in nonbpd,

This is a post from my daughter in her on line journal

'This is my thoughts about her post first"
To me it is obvious she feeds off any and all attention. I just let her do whatever since she thinks we are trash and she is way above us since she lives with her boyfriend and his family,his dads a professor. I say that while she was home she might not have been surrounded by IQs and PHDs but we had morals and love and would have directed her away from stripping. Its been 2 years that she's lived with them. She's watched the oldest son in the family be accused of rape and now my daughter is doing the cage thing!! I feel sorry for the 14/15 year old girl that still lives in the home. I hope she's ok after all this. Just read the excert below and remember this was Miss Norman of Tomorrow, Pom Captain, class president 3 years, all around state gymnast, scholarship winner for church camp, Miss Acrodance Oklahoma, 3 years homecoming queen and the list goes on and on. You can't say she didn't at one time have dreams and that we didn't give every dime and minute we had to support her. I have not one regret for the time and money spent. I only wish I would have helped her to develope her inner self through volunteering and giving to others. You can tell that all that drives her at this point is "who is noticing me."
I've been the one that notices when she is hurting even though she puts on that fake smile so no one else knows, I notice when her when she drives by and tries to ignore me but I know her eyes are looking through her sunglasses and see the tears streaming from my eyes.I love her no matter what but that just isn't enough and she just can't except my love. Someday....maybe someday....By the way my daughter just turned 19.

This is a post from my daughter in her on line journal
5th April 2004
9:31am: Cage Dancer...oh yeah...
Yes, it's been forever since I have updated my journal...sorry ya'll. Life is crazy as usual...school, work...being a cage dancer for Kid Rock...lol. So here's the deal. I was at work on Saturday and this guy (Steve) came up and asked me if I liked Kid Rock. I said "Yeah, I guess", assuming he was trying to sell me tickets. To my surprise the next thing he asked is if I wanted to be a dancer for his show that night for $75. I asked if he was serious...he was, so I said sure. He asked if I had stretch marks, tattoos, and asked about my bra size. No tattoos or stretch marks...I fit the bill. He called up the manager and set a time and place for me to meet him, so I could be looked over before the show to make sure I was what they were looking for. I asked Steve why he was at Sooner Mall trying to find a dancer for the show...apparently 3 of the dancers at Kid Rocks last show pissed him off, becuase they were too busy watching him instead of playing to the crowd...so he fired them! Steve told me to get 2 bikinis and some stillhetto heels and meet him and his manager (Keith) at Martini Lounge at 5. I got there, met the man. He told me to stand up, turn around, and then he said "Perfect". From there we went to the Ford Center. Parked in the VIP section, went through security, got backstage/dancer passes, and I started getting ready. I met the other girls a couple of hours later. It was really great. I met the actual show/tour producers for Kid Rock. They were great. They also ran the American Idol tour...which I saw. They said Clay Aiken was so full of himself, lol. Anywho-I put on my red bikini and heels. The other gals had on bikinis and heels, too. I did thier body make-up, hehe. Painted on abs and accentuated thier breasts with eye shadow and blush. How funny, huh? I am back stage at Kid Rocks concert painting strippers up while they are guzzling Vodka and popping pills, lol! Shortly after the other gals got there we were briefed on what to do. There were two cages with stripper poles in them...there would be 2 girls in each cage during specific songs during the show. I went in during the second song...it was incredible! I felt so shy backstage in my bikini, but on stage I felt dead sexy! It was great! AHHHH!!! Ryan was understandabley not thrilled about the situation...but he did come to the show to watch over/support me even though he isn't a Kid Rock fan at all. I was really happy that he was there. He said that I was the best little whore up there...lol. He was really understanding...he knew I was just doing my job. It was a friggin' blast. After teh show, we all got dressed and met Kidd Rock and Fuel. Kid forgot to take his anti-inflammatory pills b4 the show, so he was sitting down, icing his knees. Poor guy. He was really nice though, very down to Earth. I thanked him and let him know that I had a good time. And I got up to leave and meet Ryan at Bricktown Live. On my way out, I saw Stephanie (the drummer for KR). I was so thrilled to meet her...(oh by the way, I play the drums now, lol...I have my own kit and have been playing for a few months). She was so friggin' awesome. And short! She was like 2 inches shorter than me! She used ot be a bassist until her buddies found out she could play teh drums...she told me, as a woman to stick with the drums. If I do that I will never be out of a job. Great advice...I'm gonna follow it. After I got out of there, I went to Bricktown Live. It was a $5 cover and I didn't have my cash on me...so I asked the door man if there was any way that I could just go in to look for my b/f. He stopped me and said..."Wait, you were the dancer in the red bikini, weren't you?" I said yes, and he said to go on in. LOL Found Ryan, we went back to Norman...I had a hella head-ache from the pyro and explosions...we stopped at 7-11 to grab a snack and this fella ina white truck pulled up next to me and started freakin' out. He started motioning that he had been at the concert and recognized me...it was too funny! I called up the KATT this morn, becuase they were talking about the dancers and were wondering how they got the gig...so I chit-chatted with those fellas a little. I even plugged Lazarus 4, hehe. It was a good convo, too. Well, that was my big story for the next few months...enjoy! And if you saw the blonde cage dancer in the red bikini, that was soooo me!
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